She Glows

With the She Speaks conference less than two weeks away, I'm in full-throttle prep mode. This year, that means practicing what I'll be saying to the publishers with whom I'm meeting, practicing a mini-talk I was asked to give, and working on sign-up sheets for the critique groups that will form after the conference is over.

At the same time, I'm pulling together a long list of supplies for my 20 year old son and 14 year old daughter as they prepare for a 10-day mission trip to Haiti; they leave just a few days after I return from the conference. (Crazy timing!)

Two things I'm most looking forward to are getting to know writer/speaker friends (both old and new) and spending time in the prayer room. There's just something about being around like-minded women that absolutely catapults me into bliss. And the prayer room? Phenomenal. Holy. Awe inspiring. Life changing. As is this conference.

Some Practical Advice:

• Take a sweater. The host hotel is frigid!
• If you don't finish your book proposal in time, consider taking a One-Sheet, instead. Sample
• Bring business cards, if you have them. You'll want to stay in touch with new, like-minded friends. (Don't have any? You can always make your own! Instructions )
• In a speaker evaluation group? Visit Zoe's blog for some great tips.
• Think you're writing isn't good enough to attend the critique session? Go anyway!
• You MUST visit the prayer room. You really, really must! Really.
• Bring a tote bag. You'll need it.
• Stuff a few water bottles into your suitcase for your room. You'll thank me later.
• Don't bring note paper; you'll receive a spiral-bound notebook upon registration.
• Smile, even if you're nervous. Especially if you're nervous.

If you'll be at She Speaks this year, leave me a comment so I can get to know you. Tell me what track you're taking. Let me know what you're hoping get out of all this. And hopefully we'll see each other there! I'll be the one glowing.

If you won't be at She Speaks this year, but have attended a prior She Speaks conference--or any other writers conference...describe your experience and share what you learned or your favorite part of the conference.

When God Whispers

One of the strangest things about being obedient to God is stepping out to do what you're clearly not able to do. When I think about it, the fact that anything I've written has been published is miraculous, and clearly evidence of His grace at work.

Recently I was the guest on two radio shows. For the record, I've always been The Reluctant Speaker. It was enough that God had me write stuff and sign my name to it and put it out there, but talking on the air nearly made me hyperventilate. But He whispers to me that this is the way He wants me to go, and so I place one feeble foot in front of the other, crying out with each step, "God, are you sure?"

Have you ever felt like there's no way you can possibly do the very thing God has called you to do? As one jar of clay to another, I confess that my weakness, my inability, my awareness of my own shortcomings propel me into God's arms like nothing else. With every open door, I cling to Him more tightly, lean on Him more often, and strain to hear His voice like never before.

The other day my family went to the movies, and I'm convinced that I was there specifically to see one of the commercials. Here's what I saw:

A husband and wife arrive at a crowded performing arts theater. As they take their seats, each asks the other where their little son is. The wife thought the husband had the boy; the husband thought the boy was with his mom. That's when they both notice their son--up on the stage, seated at the grand piano. The parents both slink down in their seats while the audience murmurs.

A spotlight glaring on him, the little boy begins playing a simple song with just two fingers. The audience becomes irritated. The red-faced parents freeze in their seats. Suddenly, a tall man wearing a tuxedo glides in from the stage wings...obviously he is the star everyone has come to see and hear play the piano. The entire audience sits, gape-mouthed, wondering what the famous musician will do. He strides toward the grand piano, bends down and whispers into the little boy's ear, "Keep playing."

Standing behind the little boy, the musician places his arms on either side of him to reach the piano keys and begins playing a startlingly beautiful rendition of the childish song. The audience gasps. Together, the world famous musician and the little boy play on. Smiles break out across the audience. Glorious music sweeps through the theater.

The song ends on a spectacular note, and the little boy looks up at the musician with a grin. Together they take a bow before a standing ovation.

That is the power of God behind us. Whether we're pouring ourselves into homeschooling, a business, our family, a neighborhood Bible study or a national ministry...whatever He directs us to do...He rewards our childlike faith and our feeble efforts with His spectacular presence.

God whispers, and our hearts take courage.

He stands behind us, and a watching world smiles.

How about you? What is God whispering to you? How is He helping you?

Blueprint Freak

I admit it: I love an organized, tidy life. I prefer everything unfolding according to plan...a sensible, easy-going plan, that is. But the truth is, my life doesn't work that way. And frankly, some days I'd be happy just to know the plan.

You'd think that the One who created the earth according to His extraordinary master plan would be delighted to drop freshly crafted blueprints into our hands so we could figure out (a.) where we're going in life and (b.) precisely how on earth to get there. Yet God continually surprises me. And by that I mean things rarely go the way I expect, even when I think I'm keeping my expectations in check.

But God is far more interested in teaching us to hear His voice than making our plans unfold flawlessly.

Risky Decisions

One of the things I'm learning as I navigate this faith-walk is to try to keep my preference out of God's way. This means keeping my feelings neutral, especially when I'm in decision making mode. I have to get to the place where I'm truly content regardless of which way things go. It's a struggle.

One of the scriptures that I regularly pray over myself when I'm making a decision is: "I roll my works upon You, Lord; I commit and trust them wholly to You; Please cause my thoughts to become agreeable to Your will, and] my plans will be established and succeed." (Proverbs 16:3 - personalized by me.)

The Umpire Calls It

My number one criteria for making a decision is to follow after peace. If I sense frustration, anxiety or uncertainty, I stop immediately and pray. God does not want us to be rushed or pressured into making a decision prematurely.

Colossians 3:15 says"And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ's] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always]."

The lack of blueprints shouldn't deter us from moving ahead, but propel us closer to the Lord. It's when we cautiously tip-toe forward, our hearts straining to hear His voice, that we'll receive something even better than a set of blueprints: His personalized plan for that specific situation and exact moment in our lives. And for this blueprint freak, that's good news indeed.

How about you? Are you a blueprint freak? Do you need prayer for a decision in your life?

Overwhelmed

It feels like my family is racing in a spacecraft through a meteor shower. Sharp turns, near misses and spectacular explosions play out moment by moment, leaving us breathless. And overwhelmed.

But God is at work.

A lot of people seem to be going through a lot of difficult circumstances right now. But even when things don't make sense to my natural mind, I must choose to believe that God is at work in those circumstances.

Situations might scream, "It's all over!" But God says, "Surely as I have thought and planned, so shall it come to pass; and as I have purposed, so shall it stand." (Isaiah 14:24b)

Situations may shout, "It's too late!" But God says, "I work all things for the good of those who love Me and are called according to my purpose." (Romans 8:28 - my paraphrase.)

Situations might make us cry out, "I cannot do this!" But God says, "Fear not; there is nothing to fear for I am with you; do not look around you in terror and be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and harden you to difficulties; yes, I will help you; yes, I will hold you up and retain you with My victorious right hand of rightness and justice." (Isaiah 41:10)

I want to pray for you this week. Yes, my family is going through it. But I want to sow seeds by helping others in need, and the most powerful way I can think of is through prayer.

What are you walking through? Leave me a comment and tell me about your situation; then know I will be lifting you up in prayer all week long.

Going...Going...Gray!

This is the third and final post in a short series on why I chose to go gray. Read the first and second posts, if you haven't already.

I always said I'd never do it. Hair color was fake, and I like keeping it real. I don't wear tons of make-up. Don't paint my nails. And doggone it, I was not going to color my hair.

Then came the gray. Tons of it--entirely too much of it--at far too young an age. And I felt like a hag. At 34. So I did what I had to do. I changed my mind and, with my sister guiding me on the phone for moral support, I poured a bottle of Loreal over my head for the first time.

For fourteen years, I covered. But eventually the gray outnumbered and overcame my ability to keep up with it. Just eight days after coloring, a silver tinge stubbornly appeared at my part. Frantic to keep the evidence concealed, I began coloring my hair every 3 weeks. Then every 2-1/2 weeks.

And then I realized it just wasn't worth it any longer. Covering the premature gray hair I inherited from both sides of my family began to feel like a prison sentence. An expensive, stinky, messy cover up.

So, last August I made the bold decision to stop coloring my hair. For many months I endured tell-tale roots, and then on March 31st, unable to tolerate the half-and-half look any longer, I chopped it all off.

Let me just say that going short and gray was a real shocker for me. Initially, I gasped every time I passed a mirror. Thankfully my hair has grown a bit.

And now, I look like this:

Like it or loathe it, it's the real me.

One of the best things about going gray has been the support and compliments from my family and friends. (My husband thinks I'm hot.)

But it hasn't been easy. I live in Florida, where gray hair abounds. Sometimes I feel like I'm just another gray haired woman in a sea of silver heads.

I've also discovered I'm far more vain than I ever realized. Letting go of my light reddish brown hair has been hard. Being mistaken for someone's grandma, even harder. Yes, I realize that I'm a grandma, but I'm a young grandma, and I was never thus accused before. Can you say adjustment?

My favorite part about going gray has been learning to accept myself as I am. It's a work in progress, as it is for all women in a youth crazed, beauty driven culture. But I've received many whispered comments expressing admiration. Apparently a lot of women have taken courage from my decision, and if I've helped even one of them realize that gray can be beautiful, then I suppose that's progress. For all of us.

Who Said a Dream is Easy?

A lot of people give up on their dreams because they're not prepared for the reality of the hard work involved. The truth is, if we hope to attain our dream, we have to work hard and run after it. This week, lace up your sneakers, find a gigantic hill and run a mile straight up in the summer heat. You'll wind up breathless, sweaty, exhausted, sore, and maybe even a little cranky.

Pursuing your dream will make you feel the same way.

I can't tell you the number of people I've encountered who, when they discover I'm a writer, tell me they have a book inside them, too. When I ask them what they're doing to pursue their dream of writing a book, I'm usually met with a shrug. They fail to understand that dreams don't come to fruition without fierce effort.

Whether we want to write, dance, figure-skate, start our own business, or start a diet, we all have to work hard, and work our way up. We all have to pay our dues.

If you've ever watched American Idol, you've probably cringed when someone stands before the judges and mutilates a song. That person has a dream, but they lack the talent or the discipline (or both) to take it to the next level.

Yet we're all thrilled when someone's voice gives us goosebumps. What we should realize is that usually many years of training, practice and hard work have made that person's voice a thing of beauty.

It's the same with our dreams. Pursuing our dream requires hard work, perseverance and:

• Focus - In a culture that values multi-tasking, single-minded focus enables us to keep making progress when others veer off the path.

• Goals - Establishing realistic yet challenging goals from the beginning keeps us motivated and helps us to see our progress and adjust our course if necessary.

• Diligence - Unfortunately, the world is filled with slackers. Applying ourselves with steady, careful effort yields excellence--a trait that makes us stand out.

• Time - There are no short cuts to a dream; every dream takes time to come to fruition. If we are wise, we will use this time to learn, study, and practice, practice, practice.

• Passion - The foundation of every dream is passion. Do you love what you're doing? Pursuing your dream should excite and energize you.

• Prayer - The most important component to every dream is soaking it with our prayers every step of the way. When we submit our dreams to God, He equips us, opens doors, and gives us grace when the going gets tough.

A dream is only a wish until we do something about it. Yes, dreams are free, but we always have to do our part. How about you? What hard goal are you working toward?

The Call

I firmly believe that every one of us has a God given destiny--a calling to fulfill God's plans and purposes for our lives.

For six years God has compelled me to pursue His calling on my life to communicate, and you'll have to trust me when I tell you it wasn't my idea. I've watched in sheer astonishment as He has opened one writing door after another, even though I'm the least qualified writer on the planet.

Have you ever dreamed a dream so big it seemed ridiculous? I think God gives us ridiculous dreams so that we'll cling to Him like a knit skirt fresh out of the dryer. When we finally succeed, (and there will be plenty of fumbles) we'll know it's the result of His gift at work in us, not because we're all that. Which leads me to The Call.

Details

Over the past year, I've worked on a nonfiction book for women. I've met with a few publishers, editors and agents at writers conferences and gotten a couple of nibbles, but nothing was happening, unless you count head banging.

Until recently.

Though I had nearly given up hope, at the beginning of the year I decided to send out my book proposal one last time to one last agent. If nothing happened, I'd shelve it and pray about my next step.

Then, in the middle of my blog and Twitter break, I heard back from the agent. He was interested (!) and wondered if I had tested the book material on actual women. It hadn't even occurred to me, but I liked his suggestion, made a few phone calls, and to my surprise and delight, a focus group of women quickly formed. We met together for three weeks (to read the first three chapters--normally included in a nonfiction book proposal); a second group of women who couldn't attend the group meetings read the chapters individually. I compiled a survey, threatened every woman with bodily harm if they dared to flatter me or withhold truth, and procured promises of honest feedback.

The test group turned out to be outrageously fun! It superseded all my expectations. The suggestions and ideas I received from the women helped me to adjust and tweak the book, which made it much stronger. I'm so grateful for all their help!

And then, I sent it all back to the agent: the updated proposal and survey results. That same day he e-mailed me back with a contract. *Squeal* We chatted on the phone the next afternoon, since I had lots of questions, which he patiently answered.

So, it's official! I have a literary agent, Les Stobbe. And while there are no promises in today's publishing market, I couldn't be more thrilled that I answered the call.

How about you? Are you pursuing your calling? Do you have a ridiculous dream?