Deep Calling Unto Deep


This post is part 3 in a series. For parts 1 and 2, scroll down.
Armed with little more than desperation and a sense that God was calling me to not only take a step of faith, but embark on a journey of faith--I recently went on a 10-day Daniel fast. And I can honestly say it was the easiest, most compelling fast of my life.

On a practical level, I was fasting because I couldn't take the pain any longer, or the severe limitations caused by my ever-worsening foot condition. On a spiritual level, I longed for God to eradicate some painful emotional residue I sensed still clinging in my heart.

And God was quick to respond. Miraculously, by day two of the fast, my foot pain diminished by 80%. I even had a dream that I walked around my hardwood-floored kitchen in my stocking feet without pain. (For the record, I haven't been able to go barefoot for well over three years.) The next day, I was able to walk through my house in stocking feet without pain. Can I hear a Hallelujah?

But that wasn't all. For 10 days the Lord pinpointed His holy laser into the deep areas of my heart, bringing light and healing.

Yet I sensed God wasn't finished. As I came to the end of the 10 days, my heart was primed for God's gentle leading, and I sensed Him asking me to give up the one thing I never thought I could. Like Abraham, who followed God not knowing his final destination (see Hebrews 11:8), I agreed to go on this journey, not knowing where it will lead--uncertain of anything, really, except that I'm following. What have I given up for an undetermined length of time?

Sugar. My sweet friend, my affectionate partner in life, my motivation on many a day.

So, for now I've bid adieu to Oreos, brownies, sweetened cereal, milkshakes, donuts, caramel apples, candy corn, and my closest sweet friend, chocolate.

Why on earth would I do such a thing?

Because I sense that God wants access to the deep places I've tranquilized with home made chocolate chip cookies. He desires to fill the places I've soothed with rich, dark chocolate.

It's the release of the sweet security blanket of yumminess that to this point has always comforted me. And frankly, it's a level of dependence and vulnerability with the Lord unlike any I've experienced.

Don't get me wrong--I am not a junk food junkie; I'm a fairly healthy eater. But I've always looked forward to dessert. To my afternoon chocolate. To Starbucks hot cocoa. To any sort of sweet treat. And I began to sense that those treats were taking up a space and creating a pleasure that God Himself longs to fill. I sense the Lord saying I will go as deep as you will allow me.

At the same time, I feel a strong desire to embrace a season of self-discipline and holy restraint to see where, exactly, He will take me in all this. I'm going without and not filling myself with the things I love, so that the One I love can fill me instead.

It's sort of like an adventure. And though this past month has not been easy, I sense it will be worth it. It's a holy surrender, a journey of faith. It's deep calling unto deep.




14 comments:

Karen said...

Julie, I had no idea you suffered with this! Wow, God has given you a vision and you have responded. PTL. I too am trying to eat "better," and I've found I have less stomach problems.

Can't wait to see where this journey takes you. (hugs)

Diane said...

If he is calling you to do this, then there is definitely a higher reason and is a must, as painful as it will be. :O) Hugs fellow chocolate lover. :O)

Rachel Beran said...

You go, girl!! :) So thankful for your healing...and looking forward to hearing more about what God will do through this experience.

Cheryl Barker said...

Julie, may God continue to fill you with Himself -- and also continue to bring healing to your foot condition. Blessings to you!

Lisa said...

I too am a semi-healthy eater, sweet treat every day lover, especially CHOCOLATE!! AND a guilty by association kinda gal...if I read it I think it is meant for me as well...for now, at least, I'll allow it just "to be"!

Carolyn Counterman said...

Woman, you are hitting me where it hurts. Thank you.

ginny said...

Oh Julie that is a beautiful testament to your obedience! I don't know much about the Daniel diet, but I do know how much I love my pies, ice cream, and coffee cakes. It sounds so painful, but really, to get the results that you did, was worth the effort!
God bless you!
ginny

Tea with Tiffany said...

Julie, Thank you for sharing your story. I didn't know about your suffering. I'm sorry about your pain and I praise God for your fast and breakthrough. You inspire me. I definitely need to fast again. My last one was in January. And I need to go deeper. I'm in that dry place lately and I want to hear from Him again. Love, Tiff

Barbara Koob said...

Hi Julie,
So sorry for your long-suffering, but so glad for God's healing hand. Thanks so much for sharing! Shouting "Hallelujiah" with ya girl!

Tammy said...

Julie, I love this series you are doing on your blog. I, too, have been working at keeping the "white poison's" out of my diet since August. I always say, I'm not one for desserts or sugar -then I realized how addicted I am to sweet tea! But my salt.....whoa, nellie - now that's an addiction that has been hard to break. But I pray every morning for God to change my taste buds so that it is not such a draw. (Funny story - the other day we ate out and I told hubby and daughter the food was WAY to salty! They looked at each other then said..."YAY, you're gonna make it!")

Terri Tiffany said...

I fasted for only one day this spring so that I could hear what God wanted me to hear and to not focus on what I loved too--the first time in my life. It must be hard what you are doing but sounds like good results!

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

Such good heart-health going on here, Julie, both physically and spiritually speaking. I'm so glad for your immediate relief in your feet and for your deepening walk with Christ. You are such a treasure to him and to us.

peace~elaine

GLENDA CHILDERS said...

I love this post, Julie. I am on a bit of a journey myself . . . just starting.I am sure I will blog about it in a few months.

Fondly,
Glenda

Melanie said...

I'm so glad you've gotten relief from this pain.

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